Children Issues

General Family Law


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Finding the Humor in a Divorce

For many people, going through a divorce can be one of the most heart-wrenching things they will encounter in their lifetimes.

Meantime, some people will find the humor at such a major time in their life.

Although a divorce oftentimes means dealing with settling who gets the home, who has access to the vacation property, where the pets go, how much will be paid in alimony and/or child support, and of course who takes prime custody of any children involved, there can be some lighter times.

One matter to take seriously is making sure you hire the best Seattle family law attorney.

He or she can work with you to put you in a better position to win your case.

So, are you prepared to make the call for legal help today?

Getting Through Your Divorce with the Right Attorney

As tough as your divorce may end up being, having the right family law attorney in Seattle by your side is important.

Once you do wind your way through your divorce, will you be at the point where you can joke about it?

Sure, as tough as divorce can be, you have to know that moving forward is really your only option. Before you know it, you may meet someone else who will truly turn out to be the love of your life.

Once you get to the point of being able to accept your divorce and move on, heck, joking about it might prove to be good therapy.

Speaking of that, have you ever heard the following good divorce lines?

  • A judge interviews a woman on her pending divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?" She said, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by." "No," he commented, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?" "It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," she commented back. "I mean," he went on to say, "What are your relations like?" "I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband's parents." He responded, "Do you have a real grudge?" "No," she stated, "We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one." "Please," he stated again, "is there any infidelity in your marriage?" "Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes." "Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?" "Yes," she replied, "about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do." Getting to the point of frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?" "Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied. "I've never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He said he can't communicate with me!"
  • A Mom drives a little girl to her friend’s house to play. "Mommy," the little girl inquires, "How old are you?" "Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother notes. "It is not polite." "OK," the little girl responds, "How much do you weigh?" "Now really," the mother goes on, "These are personal questions and are really none of your business." Undaunted, the little girl fires away with, "Why did you and daddy get a divorce?" "Those are enough questions, honestly!" The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends start playing. "My Mom wouldn't tell me anything," the little girl comments to her friend. "Well," the friend responded, "All you need to do is look at her driver’s license. It's like a report card; it has everything on it." Later that night the little girl says to her mother, "I know how old you are, you are 32." The mother is surprised and inquires, "How did you find that out?" "I also know that you weigh 140 pounds." The mother is past surprise and shock now. "How in heaven's name did you find that out?" "And," the little girl says last but not least, "I know why you and daddy got a divorce." "Oh really?" the mother shoots back. "Why?" "Because you got an F in sex.
  • What do a hurricane, a tornado, a fire, and a divorce all share? These are four means by which you can lose your house!”
  • A guy goes into a post office to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically putting "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then removes a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he heads over to the balding man to inquire of him what he is doing. The man responded "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'" "But why?" the man responded with. "I'm a divorce lawyer," the man says back.
  • John inquired of his wife, Mary, what she desired to bring celebration to their 40th wedding anniversary. “Would you like a new Mink Coat?” he asked. “Not really,” responded Mary. “Well how about a new Mercedes sports car?” asked John. “No,” she told him. “What about a new vacation home in the country?” he offered. She again said no to his offer with a, “No thanks.” Frustrated he finally asked, “Well what would you like for your anniversary?” “John, I’d like a divorce,” said Mary. John took time to gather his thoughts and replied “Sorry dear, I wasn’t planning to spend that much.”
  • "Mr. Smith, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the judge offered, "and I've decided to give your wife $275 a week." "That's very fair, your honor," the husband responded in kind "And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."

Yes, many people can in fact joke about divorce.

But before you find the funny side of your divorce, make sure you have a solid family law attorney in your corner fighting for you.


  • Contact Seattle Divorce Lawyer V. Freitas